To Begin Anew
by Anake14
Summary: Previously called Once Upon a Sex Change, I adopted the story from xouchibitmytounguex. A little slip up by Deidara while on vacation causes him to be turned into a girl...How will he survive in the Akatsuki? And just what's wrong with Itachi? GenderBender: Fem!DeidaraxItachi
1. Chapter 1

**Yo! Tis I, Anake14, to tell you that, with permission from xouchibitmytonguex, that I have adopted the story 'Once Upon a Sex Change'. It will be somewhat different, but these first four chapters are originally those from the story, prior to it being deleted. Thus they are not mine, just like Naruto is not mine. So here ya go and I'll update chapter five once I finish the next chap to Goodbye Forever Beloved and God Help the Outcasts. Right, Ja Ne for now!**

_Chapter One_

Deidara slurped up the ramen noodles, finishing off the bowl of ramen. It was his first day of his three day vacation and he had decided to spend it in Konohagakure. Of course he had expected it to be quiet and relaxing... Unfortunately for him there was a three day festival going on that started the day he arrived.

Deidara sighed and stood up from his table. On his way out of the ramen tent he gave the waitress seven hundred yen and exited the tent.

Outside there was a huge crowd watching as a parade went past. Deidara glared at the crowd. So many people... Instead of doing what someone in the Akatsuki would normally do, Deidara made his way through the crowd until he finally made it to the vendors.

There were various useless items being sold but Deidara paid them no heed. He was only on this street cause it was the quietest of them all.

After a bit of walking down the street Deidara finally decided to look at some of the items for sale.

There were some dumb souvenir t-shirts with things like 'My parents went to Konoha and all I got was this stupid t-shirt". While there were plenty of dumb souvenirs like that, there were also some interesting looking paper lanterns and happy coats. It didn't take long for Deidara to stumble upon a small store that caught his interest.

The store was called "Mahou Yume". Deidara walked into the store, intrigued by its' name.

Of course the store kind of lived up to its name. There were weird paintings, small vials of liquid, colored sand, etc. It was a pretty weird store, but Deidara kind of liked it.

"May I help you?" a weary voice asked. Deidara pulled his eyes away from a small widget he had been looking at. A small old man stood at the counter. Brown eyes stared at Deidara from behind large round spectacles.

"Oh no I was just looking, un," Deidara explained. The old man nodded absentmindedly.

"Take your time," he shrugged.

Deidara turned back to the widget he had been looking at. It was a weird star shape that was hollowed out. Deidara looked at the price tag and almost dropped the item. He couldn't believe it. _Thirty thousand yen_? What was that old man thinking. Deidara put the item back where he found it and continued searching through the store.

Everything was expensive. There was only one thing that was cheap, and there were a lot of that cheap item. It was a small vial with a purple liquid in it.

"What's this, un?" Deidara asked the store keeper, not moving his gaze from the bottle.

"Huh? Oh that. Don't know. Try some and find out yourself," shrugged the old man. Deidara took the cork out of the vial. Before taking a sip he smelled it. It _smelled _okay. Without a second though Deidara glugged down the rest of it.

Not a good idea.

Deidara's stomach filled with pain and his chest felt like it was on fire. On top of that his skin started to tingle. It felt like when your foot falls asleep, or when you hit your funny bone. Fear came into Deidara's eyes and he looked over to the store keeper. The store keeper had a look of pure shock on his old face. He didn't even seem to notice when his spectacles fell from his face.

After a long moment, that seemed like years to Deidara, the pain stopped.

"W-Wh-What was that, un?" Deidara choked, gasping for air. The shop keeper shook his head as if to get rid of his surprise.

"How did that happen?" he asked himself. Deidara listened quietly to the shop keeper's ramblings. "A gender potion must have gotten mixed up with love potions..." Deidara's jaw dropped. Did this guy just say _gender _potion? He looked down at his chest and...

"YOU TURNED ME INTO A CHICK, UN!?" Deidara shouted at the top of his... Correction, _her_ lungs.

"I-I am so sorry~!" the shop keeper quickly interrupted. Deidara stopped shouting and started breathing really heavily. "Th-There is an antidote~!" At this Deidara looked up at the shop keeper. His... _Her _breathing slowed.

"What. Is. The. Antidote?" Deidara asked between gasps of air.

"Another little potion I created," the old man shrugged. "I can make it for you and give it to you free of charge but it will take a couple months to make." Deidara froze.

"A couple months, un?" he/she asked.

"Why yes, I will get start-" he didn't get to finish.

"ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME, UN!?" Deidara screamed. "I DONT HAVE A COUPLE MONTHS~! I ONLY HAVE THREE DAYS, UN~!" The old man held his head high and 'humphed' in irritation.

"If you don't calm down I won't make you the potion at all," he exclaimed stubbornly.

"You better, un," Deidara spat before turning on _her _heels and walking out the door.

Once outside Deidara headed straight to where her apartment was. As she walked she felt eyes watching her. Men.

_I'm not that pretty..._ Deidara thought in annoyance.

Of course, while walking, Deidara started to think about what her excuse would be. She couldn't just flat out tell them that she accidently drunk a gender potion created by a weird old man and then turned into a female.

It didn't take long for Deidara to come up with a plan.

_Chapter Two_

Tobi jumped around all over the place. He could barely keep in his excitement. Deidara-senpai was coming home~! Itachi walked in the room just to be hit by a tornado of happiness. Tobi.

"Itachi-san~!" Tobi shouted at the top of his lungs. "Deidara-senpai is coming home today~!" Itachi glared and roughly shoved the masked boy off.

"I know," he muttered.

"Aren't you excited!?" Tobi asked in his only too loud of a voice.

"Should I be?" Itachi asked, his voice monotone. At this Tobi kind of shied away.

"Well.... Uh...." Tobi spluttered.

"Well what?" Itachi's glare deepened.

"Lately I had noticed that Itachi-san and Deidara-senpai uh...."

"Spit it out already~!" Itachi ordered in a loud voice.

"Well the two of you had been getting closer lately and Tobi just figured..." Tobi trailed off. It was true that the two of them had been getting closer lately but it wasn't _that _kind of relationship. Just friendship.

Instead he wacked Tobi in the head.

"Baka," he muttered before turning and leaving the room. Tobi sat on the floor. Everything in the room was spinning.

It only took him a few moments, but very soon Tobi was up and running around again.

There was a knock at the door and Tobi stopped running for but a moment before rushing to the door.

He opened the door as wide as it went and jumped on the person knocking.

"Deidara-senpai~!" Tobi shouted in excitement.

"Umm... Could you please get off?" Tobi then realized it wasn't Deidara-senpai, but a... Woman? Tobi hurriedly got off of the woman. And took a moment to look at her.

She looked like Deidara, what with the same hair color and style, and with the same blue eyes but she was... A lot more feminine. This Deidara-clone wore a navy blue short skirt and a baggy cotton yellow sweater. Her socks reached her knees and she wore dark brown shoes... All in all she wore a high school outfit. That was far from normal for a ninja.

"Umm...." Tobi said nervously. A voice from behind him made both of them jump.

"Tobi~!" Itachi's voice shouted in annoyance. "Who is she?" Tobi didn't know how to answer. Instead the Deidara-clone answered for him.

"My name is Dei," the woman interrupted. "I am Deidara-sama's cousin. He fell off of his bird while on vacation and is currently being hospitalized." Both Tobi and Itachi froze at this.

"H-He what?" Itachi stammered.

"When will he come back!?" Tobi broke in before Dei could reply.

"He fell off of his bird and he will be back in around two months," Dei replied shrugging her shoulders.

"He... He fell off of his bird?" Itachi asked again, unable to believe it. Dei glared at the Uchiha.

"Do I have to repeat myself again?" she spat. Itachi simply shook his head.

"Well now how are we supposed to tell him the news?" Tobi asked in sadness. Itachi's eyes widened when he remembered what they were going to tell Deidara when he got back.

"What's the news?" asked Dei, her interest seemingly piqued. Itachi glared at Tobi, signaling him to leave, before turning to Dei to tell her. Tobi ran off instantly.

"The day after Deidara left to go on vacation the anbu attacked," Itachi practically forced the words out. "Sasori and Kisame didn't make it." Dei lifted a hand to cover her mouth and tears welled up in her eyes.

"T-They d-d-didn't make it?" Dei asked, practically crying. Itachi's eyes narrowed in suspicion. Why was _she _crying.

"S-Sorry~!" Dei apologized. "I know I shouldn't be crying but... Sasori once came to visit me and my family along with Deidara and he was such a nice guy..." Itachi gagged at this. Sasori? Nice? No one had ever gotten even the hint of a smile out of that idiotic puppet.

Before either of them could speak another word about the situation Pain came in.

"Tobi has informed me of the situation," he said in his monotone voice. "I would like to request that you stay with the Akatsuki for the time being as Deidara's replacement." Dei brightened up at the suggestion and immediately stopped crying.

"Really?" she screamed in happiness.

"But you start tomorrow," Pain informed her. "Since Kisame died Itachi doesn't have a partner anymore. You two will be teamed up for now." With that Pain left the room, leaving a shocked Itachi and an overly excited Dei alone.

"Yay~!" Dei shouted in happiness. "I always wanted to join the Akatsuki. Ever since Deidara-sama told me about it." Itachi narrowed his eyes. He still didn't trust Dei.

"Itachi-danna," Dei whined, hugging the Uchiha. Itachi flinched in disgust and pushed her away.

"Don't call me that," he ordered. "And I don't _hug._ No come on. I will show you where your room is."

Dei breathed a sigh of relief and followed Itachi. So far so good. But why on earth did she _hug _Itachi? Dei shifted uncomfortably while following Itachi up the stairs. Her habit of always saying 'un' had weakened and it was becoming easier and easier to talk normal... No_, _not normal. Talk like a _chick._ Dei shuddered at the word.

While she was lost in her thinking, Dei didn't notice Itachi had stopped walking and she accidently bumped into him. The raven haired Uchiha paused and glared over his shoulder.

"Don't touch me Dei," he snapped. Dei pouted and gave Itachi the puppy dog eyes.

"It was only an accident," Dei practically whimpered. Her imitation of a puppy dog didn't fool Itachi.

"This is your room," he continued, his glare never leaving his face. He opened the door and Dei felt instant happiness cover her face.

The walls were pitch black while the ceiling and floor were both sky blue. Small fish were painted on the walls, lightening them up a bit. This room was perfect in Dei's mind. It took Dei a few minutes to realize that there was two beds.

"Umm..." Dei hesitated.

"What?" Itachi asked, his voice sharp and cold.

"Why are there t-two beds?" Dei sputtered the word 'two'.

"We both share this room," Itachi explained, his voice not lightening up a bit. "It used to belong to me and Kisame, but now you get Kisame's bed." Dei froze. She should have known they would share a room but... It wasn't right~! A guy and a girl sharing a room?

Itachi had turned around and was already leaving the room. It took Dei a moment to realize he was leaving and she quickly ran after him.

Dei caught him just as he was about to walk down the hall.

The young raven haired Uchiha turned his head in surprise. Dei was holding onto the sleeve of his cloak, tears running down her face.

"Can... Can I see Deidara-sama's room?" she asked, her voice filled with sadness. Itachi's eyes softened and he nodded. He turned his head back to face forward and lead Dei to Deidara's old room.

Dei grinned evilly behind Itachi's back. Men were such suckers. Wait~! What was she thinking? A couple days ago she herself had been a male. Dei just wanted to get some of her personal belongings.

They passed Konan and Pain's room, then Kakuzu and Hidan's room, then Tobi's... Finally they reached Deidara's old room. Itachi opened the door for Dei and stepped to the side.

"I will leave you here," he said coldly. "You will be able to get back our room on your own." Dei walked into the room, memories flooding her. Itachi slammed the door shut, making Dei jump in surprise.

She walked over to her old bed and flopped down on it. She shoved her face into the pillow, almost suffocating. Tears rolled down her cheeks and Dei began sobbing. Why did she have to drink that potion? Why did this whole... _Sex change _thing make her so emotional? More importantly, why did Dei suddenly find herself _attracted _to Itachi? So many questions.

Dei slowly got up off the bed and made her way around the room. She grabbed the bag of clay, and of course she grabbed some articles of clothing but she stopped when she reached this certain item. It was a large crimson fan with many intricate designs. She remembered when she had received this gift. It stuck in her memory better than anything else.

**FLASHBACK**

_"But.... Nii-sama~!" Tori's voice whined. "I want to go _now_~!"_

_"Shut up Tori," growled Deidara in annoyance. Sometimes his little sister could be so annoying._

_"Mom~! Nii-chan won't take me to the festival~!" Tori shouted in her whiney voice. Deidara sighed and got out of his chair._

_"Fine, I'll take you there," he mumbled._

_"Yay~! Thank you Nii-chan~!" With that Tori and Deidara left the house._

_Almost the second they left the house they were met with the loud noise of excited chatter._

_Tori lead Deidara through the crowed. In one hand she held her small piggy bank and in the other she held Deidara's hand. She was only five years old but she already had more yen than her parents._

_"Where are we going?" Deidara asked after a while. Tori turned to look at him and held a finger up to her lips._

_"Shh," Tori smiled. She lead Deidara farther through the crowed. Finally she stopped at one of the vendors. Deidara meantime had gotten distracted by a young boy with raven hair who was a little older than himself._

_"I'm going to be right back, okay?" Deidara told his young sister. "Will you be fine by yourself?"_

_"Yup~!" Tori said enthusiastically. Deidara hesitated not a moment longer before letting go of his sister's hand and walking over to the boy._

_"Hi my name's Deidara~!" he greeted. The boy smiled at the introduction._

_"My name is-" His voice was cut off by the loud sound of a horn. Deidara pretended he had heard him anyway._

_"Cool~!" Deidara exclaimed in happiness at making a new friend._

_"You wanna' play?" the raven haired boy asked._

_"I would but I gotta' look after my sis," Deidara shrugged. The raven nodded absentmindedly._

_"Same," he laughed. "I gotta' look after my younger brother." Deidara laughed at their similarities. He heard the faint sound of his sister's voice calling to him._

_"I gotta' go," he informed the raven. He hesitated before leaving. Quickly he reached into his pocket and pulled out a small blue rock. He handed it to the raven before saying; "Here, a symbol of friendship." Deidara turned to leave but the raven grabbed his sleeve. Deidara turned to see what the raven wanted._

_"Here," the raven said while handing Deidara a crimson fan with silver tracery creating various intricate designs. "A sign of friendship." With that the raven turned around and left, leaving a stunned Deidara. Deidara shook his head and turned to run after his sister._

_"Nii-chan~!" her voice screamed in fear. She was tied up and in the back of a wagon. Fear rose up in Deidara's heart and he feebly attempted to chance after the wagon. It was to no avail though. The wagon was too fast. "Nii-chan~!" her voice shouted yet again. Tears were running down her cheeks._

**FLASHBACK: END**

Dei shook the horrible memories away from her mind and put the fan in her bag before standing up and preparing to leave the room. She hoped she would be able to pull off her new role as female long enough.

_Chapter Three_

"Itachi, Dei, I want you two to do a mission today," Pain ordered, shutting off the television. Dei and Itachi both looked at Pain with the exact same glare. _Too f*cking alike, _thought Pain with amusement.

"Fine," Dei finally said after a long moment. "Come on 'Tachi."

"Don't call me that," Itachi grumbled before standing up. Dei followed the motion and got off the couch.

"What's the mission Grandpa?" Dei teased. Pain glared at the remark and his cheeks turned scarlet.

"The mission," he began through clenched teeth. "The mission is to assassinate a..." Dei stopped listening. It was obvious Pain was talking more about the mission, but she decided to leave Itachi with finding out what the mission was.

She looked over at Itachi. His raven hair framed his face so perfectly... Wait~! What? Dei shook her head in confusion. Just _what _was she _thinking _about? Then a little voice in the back of her head reminded her. It was pheromones. This whole gender change thing had made her look at men in a... Different way than before.

"Got it?" Pain asked finally. Dei nodded, even though she hadn't really heard what Pain had said. "Good. Then go." After that last cold remark Pain left the room. Dei looked at Itachi who simply shrugged and began making his way to the door. Dei followed him without a second thought.

The second they were outside the door Dei grabbed Itachi's sleeve. He stopped walking but didn't turn his head.

"What was the mission 'Tachi? I wasn't listening." Itachi finally turned his head to face Dei.

"To assassinate a group of people who have been around for quite a few decades," he explained. "They have been kidnapping woman for years and finally a village has hired us to destroy them." Dei froze in shock. If it hadn't been for the flash back she had had a few days ago she wouldn't have cared much about the mission but...

"Hey why are you crying?" Itachi's voice asked. Dei was surprised to find the voice a little bit worried. She was even more surprised to find that she was indeed crying. It didn't take her long to realize Itachi was waiting for an answer.

"Oh it's nothing," she choked out. "I just was reminded of when Deidara's little sister was taken away from people like that." Before she could say another word Itachi pulled her into a deep embrace. Dei's eyes widened wider than she was sure they were able to go.

"What-" Dei began to ask only to be cut off.

"Don't cry." Without another word Itachi let go of Dei and turned to walk down the trail. Dei stood there frozen to the spot. She didn't know what to make of what just happened.

"You coming or not?" Itachi called back without turning to face Dei. Instead of replying Dei just nodded to herself and ran after Itachi.

The weather was pleasant, though it looked like there was going to be rain sooner or later. There was a strong wind, but it wasn't cold. Though the wind did promise that the rain clouds would come on quicker than usual.

It didn't take long for Dei to get tired. This female body wasn't as strong as her old male one. Then she remembered something.

"Wait~!" Dei called to Itachi. He stopped and turned around to face Dei. His eyebrow was raised in question.

"What is it?" he asked in a bored voice.

"Just a clan secret," Dei smirked before reaching into the clay pouch. She pulled some out and, quick as a flash, created a large white bird. She climbed onto it and beckoned the Uchiha to do the same.

"I don't know..." Itachi trailed off. Dei laughed at his nervousness.

"What?" she asked. "It seems to me that the raven is afraid of heights~!" Itachi looked down in embarrassment, his cheeks were red with embarrassment.

"Well not heights exactly..." Dei couldn't help but let a small giggle escape her lips.

"Don't worry," she assured the raven haired Uchiha. "This bird won't crash... Or explode for that matter." Finally the Uchiha sighed and let himself be persuaded into getting onto the bird's back. The bird took off the moment Itachi was on its' back, making him jerk in surprise.

"Damn bird..." he muttered. Dei smiled at the remark. It didn't take them long to get higher up in the sky and begin flying steadily.

After a while Dei shifted position and sat on her knees facing Itachi.

"Umm..." She began.

"What is it?" the Uchiha asked boredly.

"About what happened before we left..." Dei trailed off. Itachi averted his gaze in embarrassment.

"Forget it ever happened," he practically ordered. Dei leaned towards Itachi a bit more.

"But I can't~!" she complained. "And besides.... I thought you said you didn't hug?" At this Itachi whipped his gaze back to Dei's. Their eyes locked immediately. _Were her eyes always so blue? _Itachi thought to himself.

Both of them looked away in embarrassment.

"Ummm...." Dei mumbled. "I think I am going to go sit over there." While she said this she pointed over to where the bird's head was and stood up gracefully. Itachi admired the balance and grace Dei used when walking on top of the bird.

The rest of the trip was travelled in silence for a few reasons. One; both Itachi and Dei felt awkward after their conversation. Two; Dei was perfectly comfortable where she sat and Itachi didn't think he would be able to walk on the bird with the same balance Dei did. And Three; both knew they were getting very close to their destination and didn't want to move around too much. It wasn't long till the bird started to fly lower and lower.

"Hold on tight~!" Dei shouted over her shoulder. Too late. Itachi was already holding on to the bird's feathers so tight his knuckles were turning white.

The bird crashed through the branches and leaves of several different trees before skidding to a halt.

Dei turned to take a look at Itachi's face and started giggling.

"Sorry~!" she shouted with a giggle. The raven gave her the usual Uchiha glare.

"Apology not accepted," he spat. Dei sighed and stood up before walking over to Itachi. She crouched down and stared into Itachi's dark eyes.

"You don't have to be like that," Dei said in a soft voice.

"Don't know what you're talking about," spat Itachi.

"Don't lie," Dei scolded. "You know what I am talking about. One moment you are hugging me and telling me not to cry, the next you are acting as if I am some sort of deadly disease." Itachi quickly averted his gaze.

They stayed like that in silence for a few long, agonizing minutes. Finally Dei broke the silence.

"Fine," she shrugged. "Be that way."

This was going to be a long mission.

_Chapter Four_

Itachi shuffled forward, letting Dei take the lead. _Damn her to hell, _he thought with anger. _I wish Deidara was back. Then I wouldn't be in this mess~!_

Dei was too _pretty, _too _cute_, too... Too everything~! Itachi would hate himself for life if he ever lost control of his urges and... He didn't want to think about it. Why the hell did a female have to be his partner? Itachi glared at her from behind her back.

"'Tachi~!" Dei shouted, making Itachi lose his train of thought.

"What!?" he snapped.

"It's almost night time," she pointed out. Itachi's glare deepened in intensity.

"So?" he asked with malice.

"_Sooo_," Dei repeated. "There are some hot springs nearby where we can stop to make camp." Itachi's brow furrowed deeper as his annoyance increased.

"Do whatever," Itachi dismissed with a wave of his hand. Dei glared at the kingly dismissal.

"Don't treat me like you're king~!" she shouted, her arms straight at her sides and her hand balled into fists. Itachi smiled inwardly at her anger. He had to admit Dei was almost as fun to make fun of as Deidara. Almost.

"Why am I stuck with a brat like you anyways?" Itachi asked with a yawn. Dei's glare intensified and her balled fists turned white.

"I'm not a brat~!" denied Dei furiously. Why did this guy have to tease her?

"Whatever you say," Itachi shrugged. "Now where are those hot springs?" Dei hesitated a moment before completely calming down.

"This way~!" she shouted with her usual demeanor before walking off into a seemingly random direction.

Itachi could only sigh and follow in silence. He didn't fully trust the blonde's sense of direction but there was little he could do to argue.

While they walked Itachi admired Dei's physical aspects. Her sparkling blue eyes, her soft blonde hair, her long slender legs, her... Well, her everything~! Itachi knew he shouldn't feel this way for her but... Dei was just the ultimate attraction. She was like the sun and the sky. She....

"Damn it~!" Itachi thought out loud.

"You say something 'Tachi?" Dei asked curiously. It took Itachi a moment to realize he had indeed spoken his thoughts.

"It-It's nothing." Itachi blushed.

He had never blushed because of a girl before. Never. Nor had he ever stuttered because of a girl.

"Itachi-san," Dei called, interrupting Itachi's thoughts.

"Yeah?" he asked, back to his monotone voice. Dei fidgeted with her hands a bit.

"Well umm..." she hesitated. Itachi glared at her, causing her to immediately spit it out. "The hot springs are a few more meters into the woods. It would be best to set up camp here." Itachi nodded and sat down to rest his weary legs.

_____________Back to Mainly Dei's POV~!________________

Dei almost collapsed with the relief of having that burden taken off of her chest. Why couldn't she talk to Itachi? Why was it so hard for her to do? Why....

"Do you want to use the hot springs first or can I go ahead?" Itachi asked. Dei shook the thoughts away from her head.

"I would like to, please." Dei replied softly. Itachi nodded at her to go. Dei happily complied, only pausing to grab a towel from her equipment. After digging around a bit she found a nice, fluffy, white towel and headed off into the woods towards the hot spring.

It was exactly as she had predicted. The springs were only a few meters away from camp.

Dei shrugged out of her Akatsuki cloak. She slipped her mostly-fish-net-but-not-overly-revealing top over her head and threw it on the ground. Soon she was fully undressed and she slipped into the warmth and comfort of the hot springs.

Dei gave a sigh of relief and let herself be nearly completely submerged in the water. The hot water soothed her and cleared her mind. She almost jumped out of the water in unnecessary fear when her mind cleared.

"What have I been doing?" Dei whispered to no one in particular. "I can't fall for Itachi~!" She let out a long breathe of air, trying to calm herself down. _I know what I'll do,_ thought Dei. _I will make myself less attractive._

Dei waded to where her clothes were piled and picked up a small dagger. She examined it for a bit before pulling her hair into a pony tail. Dei flinched as she sliced through her hair. For her entire life she had prided in her long hair, only to part with it because of a guy. Dei hesitated before bursting out in laughter.

It was a very ironic situation she had put herself in~! Her entire life she had been teased and called a girl and now she actually was one. Dei gave one more bark of laughter before examining her hair. She picked up a used-to-be-long strand of it and smiled. Her hair was shoulder length now.

As a guy Dei had hair longer than any of the girls he/she knew. As a girl her hair would be short like a guys.

Dei smiled to herself and got out of the hot springs. She slipped back into her clothes and walked through the woods to her and Itachi's campsite.

When she got there Itachi was waiting patiently at the fire. He looked up when she entered the small camp, his eyes wide and looking straight at her hair.

"Your turn," Dei smiled sweetly, ignoring Itachi's probing eyes.

Itachi gave a curt nod and went to where the springs were.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N: Yes this is very far behind from what I planned, however it is not completely my fault seeing as my aunt virused my computer blanking out 7 pgs of work and not even a month later my sister virused it taking out more than my aunt did, thus my stories are slow in coming. You therefore cannot completely blame nor criticize me! Also, I am only calling Deidara she….I'm starting to hate writing him/her, his/her, s/he. When Dei talks about herself as Deidara the words will be masculine, but in the story in general, while he is Dei I will be calling him a she so that I don't confuse myself!

To Begin Anew

Chapter 6

Dei stared into the woods, silently remembering the flashback she had only a few days ago before being given this mission. Would the guys who took her sister have kept her? Would they have sold her for a profit after having her _trained_ to do things that are the nightmares of females? Dei grew angered and sad at the way her thoughts were going, if only her little sister had never been taken…maybe she would never have joined Akatsuki and would still be home with her and taking care of her the way she should have, for that matter she would still be a he.

Then…if that had happened, she'd have never met Itachi or Sasori or any of the other Akatsuki members… though she loathed to admit it, even to herself, she had liked being in the Akatsuki as part of an unofficial family. 'Cause really, that's what the Akatsuki was. It was a home for outcasts and missing nins who were no longer welcome in the place where they once called home because of things they had done, even if some of them were probably for the better, and now she couldn't really imagine a life without any of them.

Her thoughts were spinning and twisting as she thought of all the things the bastards who had taken her little sister could have done before doing whatever it is they do to the women and children they no longer need. It had only been after Tori, precious, lively, beautiful Tori, had been taken that she had become a missing-nin. It was only after Tori was taken that she truly realized that she wasn't complete, as if part of her soul was missing and now with Sasori and Kisame dead…it was a knife to her heart reopening a wound that had never fully healed.

Her heart felt as though it were being torn apart from within and it was because she had done what she had once sworn not to do…she had let them and the others grow close to her and she was putting herself at risk again. She had willingly opened herself to this group of people who sought to make the world more peaceful and had, at the same time, opened up to all the hurt that came with losing people she considered precious now.

So caught up in the thoughts that were plaguing her mind, Dei never realized it when Itachi had come back to the campsite and started staring at her. Itachi watched as emotions vividly flashed across Dei's eyes and face until he saw her eyes dull in silent pain and sobs wracked her frame as a single tear slipped down her cheek. For some reason, it bothered him more than it should have. What was this girl _doing_ to _him_?

"You will catch cold if you don't finish drying your hair," said Itachi in monotone though his eyes held a silent concern.

Dei jumped, slightly startled by the sudden intrusion. She looked at Itachi who had removed his cloak and was wearing a pair of black pants and a fishnet shirt beneath a short-sleeve black one. Dei blushed from seeing Itachi in such a state with his hair down slightly dripping as he dried it. "Sorry, Itachi. I was just thinking about some things that Deidara and I had once shared before he became a missing-nin. Now that I truly think about it though, I don't think he'd really change a thing. We may have lost her and the two of us may have felt as though we had failed, but whenever Deidara talks about the Akatsuki to me…it's like he finally has a chance to do things right and is happier than he's been in a long time."

Itachi raised an eyebrow. "He tells you about the Akatsuki? He's actually _happy_ with us? I don't see how considering he hates me."

_Damn_, thought Deidara. _I forgot that I wasn't supposed to really tell anybody about Akatsuki._ Dei lightly blushed and gave a small smile. "I am the only one left. I am his only security that someone cares, because there is no way of telling if his little sister would ever forgive him or me for what has happened to her, but more than that, we don't even know if she's _alive_. He has only ever told me about the Akatsuki, and yes he is happy there. As for him hating you…well I can't really say. The only two her ever actually mentioned were Sasori and Tobi."

Itachi felt a sharp pain in his chest, but kept his face as blank as ever. "I see."

"For what it's worth, Deidara hated me in the beginning as well…he only recently started to put up with me, and even still he probably hates me as well…" said Dei as she lay back and looked up at the stars. "Deidara…he does not like feeling helpless, he is not weak or as subject to his emotions as he has led people on to believe. You, for example, have a commanding, dominant presence that is somehow comforting and that is something our family lacked, therefore both he and I don't really know how to react which is why I was uncomfortable at first. Besides that, Deidara is self- conscious, I would be too if my relationship ended the way it had, but all the more reason to live without regrets…G'night 'Tachi."

Dei shut her eyes and went to sleep. Her chest rose and fell in a steady rhythm, and all Itachi could do was stare. Was there really so much about his blond teammate he didn't know? Wait- _his_? When had _Dei_ become _his_? Kami, Deidara would kill him, if he ever found out what he had just been thinking… then again, Deidara made it his personal goal to kill him if they survived in the Akatsuki long enough.

Itachi just jumped up into a tree and kept watch until morning.

A/N: I know many people were waiting for an update but this is all I was able to recover since I have been busy and all. The next chapter will be longer! I promise! Just think of this as a really short filler till I recover the other pages I had written…that are somewhere…


	3. Chapter 3

To Begin Anew

Disclaimer: I do not own it. Never have and never will. Besides, the plotline does not suit my purposes enough to be something I'd think of.

Chapter 3- Broken Heart, Shattered Soul

The morning that followed was rather quiet as they continued their journey together. Dei's thoughts had once more turned to Tori and how different life would have been if she had never been taken, yet those thoughts were given little merit. Dei had long since decided that it would be best to get everything over with. The sooner the three months passed, the sooner she could return to being a he and as Deidara he would forget all about the feelings that were currently residing for the missing-nin who had become his partner.

Itachi's mind was still on what Dei had said the night before. She had been open with him and told him bits and pieces about who she was underneath, she had shown him who _she_ was behind the mask she wore and told him things about Deidara he had never thought to know. Dei had told him that Deidara had had liked being in the Akatsuki and might not really hate him…it made him feel so strange. He had never really thought that Deidara would be any good at acting, or hiding anything.

From what Dei had told him of Deidara, Deidara didn't want to seem weak…but why was that? What more was there to the story that she could be hiding? And what was that about when she mentioned them finding his presence comforting and it being unsettling? Why had she brought up Deidara's last relationship for that matter? It was so strange to be learning about someone he thought hated him mutually, and finding out that it might not be so mutual after all…

Dei was walking slightly ahead of Itachi, having decided when they first set out that today they would go slower and without the help of her clay birds. Dei knew that Itachi had his mind on the things she had said last night and that he would eventually want answers. She almost wished she had said nothing, but she knew that as Itachi's partner she'd never have been able to keep secrets from him and she'd rather he found out from her telling him than him entering her mind.

If Itachi entered her mind he'd know about her being Deidara just by going through her memories. He'd find out about all her mistakes and what had happened in her life, he'd even find out about how she changed and the damned feelings she'd been having the past few days…and if he did that he'd be disgusted, he'd hate her even more.

_I'd be okay with that wouldn't I?_ Thought Deidara, _All the better if he hated me more right?_

Even with those fleeting thoughts, it brought pain and for some reason unknown to Dei, she knew that it wasn't true. If Itachi hated her even more, she knew she wouldn't be able to remain with the Akatsuki and she wouldn't be stable. She knew that everything she strived for would be worthless because she'd never be able to face him or act normally, and it frightened her. She was scared that he would destroy that little bit of happiness she had found, that he could take it all away so damn _easily_. And she knew he wouldn't care. He wouldn't care about any of it, he'd still be that damned emotionless bastard that he was.

_I will not think of it any longer. I will go back to Konoha in three months, get the thrice-damned potion, drink it, and go back to being __**me**__. This will all be as if it had never happened, and he will forget that the female Dei ever existed. This will all be as if it never was,_ thought Dei. She prayed to the Goddess it was true, because if it wasn't she wasn't sure how she'd continue moving forward.

Without realizing it she began humming and singing a song, one she hadn't sung in a long time, because it reminded her of the past. Itachi listened to her sing, her voice was sad, melodious, and sounded beautiful. The words passed from Dei's lips in low tones, her voice taking on her emotions of sadness,

"There's a girl

Who sits under the bleachers

Just another day eating alone

And though she smiles

There is something just hiding

And she can't find a way to relate

She just goes unnoticed

As the crowd passes by

And she'll pretend to be busy

When inside she just wants to cry

She'll say...

Take a little look at the life of Miss Always Invisible

Look a little harder I really really want

You to put yourself in her shoes

Take another look at the face of Miss Always Invisible

Look a little harder and maybe then you

Will see why she waits for the day that

You will ask her...her name

The beginning, in the first weeks of class

She did everything to try and fit in

But the others, they couldn't seem to

Get past all the things that mismatched

On the surface

And she would close her eyes when they left

And she fell down the stairs

And the more that they joked

And the more that they screamed

She retreated to where she is now

And she'll sing...

Take a little look at the life of Miss Always Invisible

Look a little harder I really really want

You to put yourself in her shoes

Take a little look at the face of Miss Always Invisible

Look a little closer and maybe then you

Will see why she waits for the day that

You will ask her...her name

And one day just the same as the last

Just the days been in counting the time

Came a boy that sat under the bleachers just

A little bit further behind..."

Silence fell upon them in the clearing where her song had ended. She sat down and pulled out the scroll she had used to seal their lunch in. Itachi moved forward and sat down a little further away from her. Both of them were unwilling to break the silence that had fallen upon them, though they both knew it wouldn't last too long they were comfortable for the moment.

She handed him his lunch and began to eat her own at a clam pace, as if for just that moment everything was right in the world. The sun's rays hit the clearing as Dei moved her hand to push a stray lock of hair back behind her ear, it made her look ethereal. Itachi found that he could not look away from the sight, Dei looked beautiful at that moment, and he found himself thinking she should never have chosen this way of life, it did not seem to suit her.

Finally, he spoke, breaking their silence in hopes of forgetting his most recent thoughts of his companion. "Why did you tell me all of that yesterday, about your past and Deidara's?"

"I felt, you had the right to know. Even if I am going to leave after he recovers from his trip to the hospital, I think you should know a little about him this way when the two of you becomes partners you'll understand him a bit. You have to understand our family was not a clan's family, but they bore ideals that were shoved onto us and made us grow up without comfort. There was no such thing as love or happiness, we did not even have the ability to choose," said Dei, her eyes glazing over in remembrance. They had hated their home, their family, but they had been raised and taken care of and so they had been grateful, but that was the extent. Both Deidara and Tori had tried to fill their neglect with each other's love and replace it with their own ideals. It was simply how they lived and managed to survive in Iwa.

Itachi spoke in his usual monotone, "I still do not understand why you spoke to me of Deidara's last relationship or why you told me about how he didn't want to seem weak, though you hinted at something. Tell me, what is it you didn't say?"

Dei flinched from how cold and harsh the words seemed. She hadn't realized just how much she said, she ha d just been so _tired_ last night, it hadn't occurred to her she might have said too much…but she had, and now she was going to have to run interference or deal with the fall out. As Deidara she would have never said anything, not about the last relationship, not about the past, and she most certainly wouldn't have spoken to _Itachi_ of all people about any of those things.

"There are many reasons people become who they are Itachi. Your reasons for joining Akatsuki and mine are different even from Deidara's who only joined because you defeated him and took him there by force. However I know that eventually he would've sought out anyone who might understand. Have any of you ever wondered about Deidara's fascination and sheer belief that art is meant to be a blast? That true art is fleeting and all about the moment?" asked Dei, trying to calm her nerves and think of how much she would reveal to Itachi in this conversation. She couldn't tell him everything, but she most certainly wouldn't be able to get out of telling him at least something.

Itachi shook his head in response to her questions, he had never really thought about asking anyone any of their reasons. To him they were all insane, all obsessive, and all criminals, nothing really worth knowing about.

Dei sighed, having already known that would be his response, and said, "Deidara's last relationship is what led to his love of art and that very belief. It ended horribly, in such a way, not even I would wish it upon another. It was an act of betrayal in the cruelest of ways that left him shattered and trying to pick up the pieces. Not even a few months later we lost _her_ and had no clue as to whether she is alive or dead, further throwing him into turmoil. He felt like what that _bastard_, that Kami-damned _bastard_, was right, and it made him feel weak and unworthy of the very little love he had received. For all of us, it was painful, but he kept going as if it were nothing…just watching him hurt. It was painful watching him _try_…

"I remember him staring at a mirror at one point, his eyes were so _dead_ and it was too much. He couldn't even see himself any more it was like he was looking at nothing, like he wanted to just die or to have never existed. No one knew if he'd ever get over it, if he'd survive it, not even he knew. It was hard to watch him in that state for so long. Just before she was taken he had started to get better, little by little he was coming back. With his failure, and mine though he'd never acknowledge it, he had closed up again, like it was all thrown back into his face about how weak he was, how he'd never amount to anything, how he _should have never been born_. It was like a slap to his face. He was lost for so long, and when you defeated him it made him try to get stronger. You were the first person to acknowledge him in such a way that he could strive to be stronger, and when you hated him it gave him a purpose because he knew you saw _him_."

Itachi was in shock though the only way you could tell was by the slight widening of his eyes. He had no idea Deidara had gone through something that had made him want to die before he joined the Akatsuki, it was worrying. Would he still try to kill himself? Did he do the things he did around the other members because he was suicidal? Finally he asked, "What happened in that relationship thatput him in such a state?"

Dei's eyes that had held back tears earlier finally held no bounds as they fell free for the first time in years. When she spoke it was as though part of her had died and would never be the same by telling Itachi the answer, but she did and she knew he wouldn't like it. That dead voice and those cold eyes that held no life, made Itachi shiver as he heard the answer.

"Deidara was raped…"

A/N: Yes, I know I'm cruel. Yes, I'm leaving it here but there is more of Dei's response to be heard in the next chapter. I'll pick this up when I have time, which I'm not sure when that will be since I am in my senior year of high school. Read, Review, Throw a party…well maybe not the last one, but have fun! Ja!


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: Yes, many of you may or may not want to kill me right now, but I am very busy and school is my top priority right now. All my stories are on hiatus due to my inability to cope with both school and housework and homework and family and my writing. Deidara will still be referred to in masculine tone when talking about him as male but for the most part I will be calling him a female due to not wanting to screw my own brain over more than I already have.

To Begin Anew

Disclaimer: I do not own it. Never have and never will. Besides, the plotline does not suit my purposes enough to be something I'd think of.

Chapter 4 (…I think…): Painful Memories

Previously in the last chapter

Dei's eyes that had held back tears earlier finally held no bounds as they fell free for the first time in years. When she spoke it was as though part of her had died and would never be the same by telling Itachi the answer, but she did and she knew he wouldn't like it. That dead voice and those cold eyes that held no life, made Itachi shiver as he heard the answer.

"Deidara was raped…"

Now

"…he was raped by the one he believed he could love more than his own life. He willingly disobeyed his father and suffered a great many consequences," said Dei, in a small, heartbroken voice. "I remember his punishments and treating the wounds he received from them. I remember the scars that were left on his body and I remember his will to not scream no matter how much pain he was in. I…the thing I remember most about Deidara's relationship was how content he was. I have told you our family was not very kind and did not really have any warmth. In fact they were so cold that you could practically see how fake the love they showed was and how disappointed they were in us. Our only comfort was each other and that was just fine. When Deidara fell in love for real I thought it was wonderful, something I could look forward to in the future."

Dei stopped speaking as her frame shook with silent sobs. It was hard to tell this story, harder still that she knew Itachi would never know she was actually Deidara, but she also knew he would never be able to look at her the way she wanted and it hurt to know that he would go back to hating her once she returned to her male form.

"What happened, Dei? What would make Deidara wish for death?" asked Itachi in a soft voice.

Dei looked down and shifted from her position. When she spoke Itachi almost wished he hadn't asked. "When Deidara was raped by the one he had fallen in love with that person said many hurtful things to him. That djheval son of a thrice cursed djinn whispered words that plagued Deidara since his childhood. Every word Deidara heard from his family, that he was worthless, a tool, that he was weak and a disgrace, but what hurt the most is when he told Deidara that he could never love someone who was weak and would believe the first person to offer kind words, all the while raping Deidara who was severely wounded by the bastard and his friends and in a horribly weakened state. Just before leaving Deidara for dead that bakemono told him that he should have never been born and that he was a disgrace as a shinobi.

"It killed Deidara from the inside. He survived the attack and pulled through, but for all the life he had he may as well have been gone. The Deidara that we remembered was gone, there was no more happiness or feelings of content. Watching him try for us and knowing that we were the only reason he was is something I will never forget. It was painful to put it simply. He was a shell, half the person he should have been."

"Then how did he start moving on?" asked Itachi, he knew it would be hard to pull through something like that and that the pain Deidara must have felt would have been incredible.

For the first time since the beginning of their conversation Dei smiled a genuine, soft smile. "He had his little sister. She was the one to help him, healed him, and gave him a reason to get stronger. She was everything to him and he loved her for her kindness and forgiving nature. He loved her for being there and for loving him even though he believed he was too weak to protect her. They were always together; the two of them were a force to be reckoned with and even their parents who were considered of high station could not get around those two. Their bond as siblings was strong, I doubt if I will ever see another as strong as theirs. Sometimes it was as though there was a mental link between the two they were so in tune with each other."

Itachi smiled at the thought of their sibling bond and fondly remembered how he was with Sasuke. He didn't get to see Sasuke as often as he wanted and he may not have gotten to bond with him because of his 'duties' to the clan, but the fact remained that Sasuke and himself were strongly linked together, though nowhere near as close as Deidara was with his sister.

"Anyway, we should be moving on. After our job of the elimination of the missing-nin and the slave traders I have to go back home. Deidara should be better by then," said Dei.

Itachi nodded knowing he would not be getting any more information about Deidara's past from his female blond partner…at least not at the moment. They hopped off into the trees and set out in a north-western direction headed for their job. Itachi was slightly saddened that Dei would be leaving and he would never see her again, but maybe he could visit her…he shook his head of those thoughts, it wouldn't work he was a missing-nin and besides that Deidara hated him, he'd never let him anywhere near Dei.

Dei sped off determined. _Never again,_ thought Dei. _I will save those who were taken by the slave traders and missing-nin. I will avenge Tori and those who have suffered at the hands of people like that bastard, but more than that I will find out the fate of my little sister and save her if she is alive._

A/N: *pouts* It's short again but it offers closure from the last one where I gave you guys a cliffhanger. I'm sorry about that but it really is the best I can do right now, I'm having family issues and there have been so many complications lately with my mom in the hospital and what not.


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: Gomen, I will try to update more but look at it this way:

I'm a senior in high school.

My last day is May 27th.

I will then update more often over the summer until I go to college and hopefully finish one of my fanfics and the book I have been writing for the past six years.

So, I will now let you read the story without any more of my random irritants.

To Begin Anew

Disclaimer: I do not own it. Never have and never will. Besides, the plotline does not suit my purposes enough to be something I'd think of if it did there would be several things I'd do to fix the things I really don't like, plus I think the plot has pretty much been destroyed. The only thing I currently own are a collection of stories that I've written for books that I haven't finished…

Chapter 5 (…I think…): The Mission (Part 1)

Previously in the last chapter

"Anyway, we should be moving on. After our job of the elimination of the missing-nin and the slave traders I have to go back home. Deidara should be better by then," said Dei.

Itachi nodded knowing he would not be getting any more information about Deidara's past from his female blond partner…at least not at the moment. They hopped off into the trees and set out in a north-western direction headed for their job. Itachi was slightly saddened that Dei would be leaving and he would never see her again, but maybe he could visit her…he shook his head of those thoughts, it wouldn't work he was a missing-nin and besides that Deidara hated him, he'd never let him anywhere near Dei.

Dei sped off determined. _Never again,_ thought Dei. _I will save those who were taken by the slave traders and missing-nin. I will avenge Tori and those who have suffered at the hands of people like that bastard, but more than that I will find out the fate of my little sister and save her if she is alive._

Now

Dei and Itachi hadn't stopped again until well into the night and even then it would only last until the dawn. Their brief interludes for food and water were short and they covered their tracks as efficiently as possible. It was not until the sixth day did they reach their destination.

"We're finally here," sighed Dei, resigned to the mission and the role she would have to play while they entered the town.

Flashback to the night before

"_Dei, I've been thinking about the mission, I know of a way we can infiltrate the base," said Itachi._

_Dei quirked an eyebrow, "And that would be?"_

_Itachi sighed, "You're not going to like it, but it would be best if you hide your chakra and dress nice, you can lure the guys to you and have them take you directly into the base by pretending to be weak and letting them grab you."_

_Dei's eyes widened, she stuttered, "Are you insane? What if they decide to torture me? Or worse, rape me? Do you even realize what you're asking me to do? You're asking me to go with the bastards who might have taken…"_

"_Taken?" queried Itachi as Dei cut off her response._

"_It's personal," Dei huffed. "Even if it was your concern I wouldn't tell you without Deidara's approval and I know he wouldn't give it."_

"_If it's personal you shouldn't have been allowed on this mission at all," Itachi whispered in Dei's ear, as Dei shuddered and thought, 'When did he get this close? I didn't even know he moved…'_

"_In fact," Itachi continued, "involving personal issues with a mission can get you or me or both of us killed. I think that entitles me to know what your secondary objective on this mission is."_

_Dei pouted and chewed on her lower lip, "Fine, but this stays between us and you can't betray this secret, in fact," Dei grabbed Itachi's wrist and made a small cut on it as well as her own before putting the wounds together and allowing the blood to mix, "now, you can't tell anyone without you breaking the bond."_

"_What bond is this?" Itachi asked incredulously._

"_It's a blood bond, if you tell anyone then by right I or anyone in my family can take your life in return, I'm sorry," apologized Dei, "I had to do it. I can't risk letting the others getting hold of this news."_

_Itachi inclined his head, giving Dei the signal to continue. "Deidara's little sister was taken by men, at a festival when they were young."_

_Dei was too lost in the memories to see Itachi's look of dawning understanding, her eyes were blank as she spoke, her face gave nothing away, "The caravan that took her had much the same symbol as the one we are going after. I have to know what happened to her, when she was gone Deidara was so __**broken**__, watching him was painful. The beatings, the rape, everything just fell on top of him and God did it hurt to watch him trying. After Tori was gone and I was all he had left nothing really mattered, he was losing his fight, he was dying because he blamed himself. He used to mutter in his sleep, in his nightmares, 'useless…worthless…unwanted…weak…powerless' because that's what he'd been told, and that's what he believed when he lost his sister. His parents had already hated him, her being gone just made it worse, he didn't have his light anymore._

"_I think…maybe you saved him, maybe you gave him something to fight for. When you beat him and forced him into the Akatsuki, I think you gave him a reason to be stronger, a reason to continue. I'm not sure what would have happened if you hadn't but it's worth it to see him as he once was. This mission is my best chance to find out what happened to her, his little sister, and if that means I risk my life then so be it, but that is my choice."_

"_Fine," said Itachi, his voice emotionless. Nothing more was said for the rest of the night._

Flashback end

"I'll go get us a room. Can you please buy me something to wear for tonight, Itachi?" Dei asked wearily.

"Hai," and with that one word Itachi left Dei's side, off to complete her request.

'It feels weird to be without him,' thought Dei. 'I've become so used to his presence…I shouldn't though. As soon as I go back to being male he'll hate me again…but do I really want to be male again?" Dei shook her head, 'Of course I do, I have to. It's not like it would make a difference to Itachi, but at least in this form he tolerates me.'

Dei sighed and ran a hand through her hair as she spotted a nice looking inn just up the street she was on, 'I can't get attached to him. I'll just try to distance myself, after all it's not like I could hope for more…it's not like I expect him to fall in love with me or ask me to stay. I kind of wish he would.'

Dei stopped in her tracks as she repeated the thought in her mind, before shaking herself and continuing her movement toward the inn. 'I can't have fallen for him, I can't ha hates me, he can't stand me…he'll probably be happy when I leave.'

"It won't matter, soon enough I'll go back to Konoha, get the potion, and go back to being Deidara," she whispered to herself to low for anyone to hear as she walked into the inn.

"Hello, how can I help you?" asked the man standing behind the front desk.

"Hi," said Dei shyly, blushing lightly. The man looked about twenty-two years old, he had reddish-brown hair and emerald green eyes. He had a slender body that was well defined and nearly a head taller than Dei. "I need two rooms, or one room with two beds."

The man looked at Dei apologetically, "I'm sorry, we only have one room left and there's only one bed in it."

"Oh, that's okay, I guess I'll take that one," stuttered Dei, blushing brighter. "How much is it?"

"It'll be one thousand yen for two nights," he responded smiling.

"Thank you," said Dei as she couldn't help but smile back thinking, 'He seems like a really nice guy. He's better than a lot of the men out there.'

Handing him the money as he handed her the key, he said, "I hope I see you later."

Dei blushed at the implications and scurried off to the room he had given her. According to the key it was room 120B. She stopped as she arrived in front of the door and opened it hastily. The room was nice, a queen size bed, the sheets were a light brown color and the comforter was a comforting sage green. The walls of the room were painted a light blue, 'sky blue,' Dei's mind supplied. The adjoining bathroom was decently sized. It would suit their purposes, just fine. Dei flared her chakra a bit to let Itachi know where she was before deciding to rest a bit while she waited for him. Laying down on the bed she soon fell fast asleep, never noticing the figure perched in the tree staring at her from outside the window.

A/N: That's a wrap! Ha! I actually typed something! I can't even tell you how good it feels to have typed something that isn't an essay for English, a research paper for Latin, a behavior analysis for psych, while touching math work for Calculus! MWAHAHAHAHAH! I shall be back! (*giggles* Soon hopefully, if school doesn't prevent it again…)

One more thing I need you to review and leave opinions on an idea I had while talking with my friend, which she thinks I should actually make an attempt to write which I told her I might over the summer if I get reviews telling me how likely you would be to read the story that is a crossover between Inuyasha/Naruto/ FMA with the following plotline:

Edward Elric was adopted by Trisha and Hoenhiem when they found his as an infant and all he has is a letter left by his parents explaining why they couldn't take care of him. But who exactly are they, better yet, who are their enemies? Sess/Naru Ed/Must.

IDK if Naru will be female, but if I write this all of it will be heavily based off of reviews and what fans want. Any other pairings, Het, Yuri, Yaoi, I will gladly write in, just let me know your opinions!


	6. Chapter 6

A/N: I haven't updated this in forever…mostly because I lost interest in the Naruto fandom and ended up going through some stressful drama. While I may no longer be completely into the Naruto fandom, I do remember my plotline for this story and actually can continue it since it has just about _nothing_ to do with the series itself. Thank you guys for being patient with me, as always. As for the fandom that too Naruto's place…I may now be enraptured by Hetalia, nothing says let's learn history inaccurately like stereotyped human country personifications.

To Begin Anew

Disclaimer: I do not own it. Never have and never will. Besides, the plotline does not suit my purposes enough to be something I'd think of if it did there would be several things I'd do to fix the things I really don't like, plus I think the plot has pretty much been destroyed. The only thing I currently own are a collection of stories that I've written for books that I haven't finished…

Chapter 6: The Mission (Part 2)

Previous

"_Hello, how can I help you?" asked the man standing behind the front desk. _

"_Hi," said Dei shyly, blushing lightly. The man looked about twenty-two years old, he had reddish-brown hair and emerald green eyes. He had a slender body that was well defined and nearly a head taller than Dei. "I need two rooms, or one room with two beds."_

_The man looked at Dei apologetically, "I'm sorry, we only have one room left and there's only one bed in it."_

"_Oh, that's okay, I guess I'll take that one," stuttered Dei, blushing brighter. "How much is it?"_

"_It'll be one thousand yen for two nights," he responded smiling._

"_Thank you," said Dei as she couldn't help but smile back thinking, 'He seems like a really nice guy. He's better than a lot of the men out there.' _

_Handing him the money as he handed her the key, he said, "I hope I see you later."_

_Dei blushed at the implications and scurried off to the room he had given her. According to the key it was room 120B. She stopped as she arrived in front of the door and opened it hastily. The room was nice, a queen size bed, the sheets were a light brown color and the comforter was a comforting sage green. The walls of the room were painted a light blue, 'sky blue,' Dei's mind supplied. The adjoining bathroom was decently sized. It would suit their purposes, just fine. Dei flared her chakra a bit to let Itachi know where she was before deciding to rest a bit while she waited for him. Laying down on the bed she soon fell fast asleep, never noticing the figure perched in the tree staring at her from outside the window._

Now

When Dei was awakened it was to the light shaking of her shoulder and a soft voice calling her name. "Dei…Dei…up…wake…mission…"

She caught bits and pieces of the words, as she slowly awakened, blinking her eyes when she realized how close her face was to Itachi's, who was shaking her shoulder and whispering near her ear. She felt herself shiver from hearing his voice and his breath blowing on her ear. She couldn't help but wonder if all females were so sensitive to such things.

The thought made her blush as she finally spoke, her voice still addled with sleep, "I'm up, 'Tachi, I'm up. Just move for a mo'."

Itachi blinked as he realized, yes she was awake, Dei was also just barely half asleep. He smirked in amusement, but said nothing as he backed away and let her sit up and survey their surroundings.

She blinked at him. "You did that on purpose," she accused.

He tilted his head, but neither agreed nor disagreed with her. Dei couldn't help but sigh, really, she had thought Itachi had gotten better at being social. Or maybe she was just better at reading people as a female? Ugh, she really didn't want to think about it right now, she'd be depressed in a short span of time if she let herself thing about it at all.

"So what'd ya get me?" she asked curiously, staring at the bad he held out to her, now that she was more awake. Itachi didn't answer, merely handing her the bag and taking her place on the bed once she got off and started for the bathroom. She huffed at him, but once the door to the bathroom was closed she let an amused smile make its' way onto her face. Itachi could be charming in his own way; it really wasn't hard to see why Uchiha had so many fan girls. The thought made her slightly sad, she could be replaced so easily once she returned to being male, she had no idea how she would cope with it all, Itachi would hate her, she'd never be able to tell him anything, never mind the fact that being a female _sucked_ just because of all the hormones and mood swings and now she wanted to cry.

'Damn it, get a hold of yourself Deidara,' she snarled mentally. 'We don't have time for this, breakdown and have the identity crisis later!'

She showered quickly, after so much time as female she finally realized why women bothered putting so much time into getting ready, the hair was obvious, but the rest was typically uncomfortable and she had to be decent for the night. She took extra time to get all the dirt from their travelling off her first, washed her hair and tied it up while she took care of her body, by the time she let her hair down and let the water wash away the soap, she was distinctly more comfortable.

She dried off quickly and slipped on the undergarments before looking into the bag to see what Itachi got her. It wasn't a slutty dress, surprisingly enough. It looked a bit old fashioned, perhaps sultry in a way, it fell a little past her knees in the back and the front went to her thighs, a nice shade of blue, maybe a midnight or navy but either way it looked nice considering the cleavage was mostly covered and the dress was very appealing in the right ways but none too fancy. If anything she would be a target simply because she looked completely foreign and like she just wanted to enjoy a night out in town, something other members of the Akatsuki often leered at and for once she felt disgust at the thought.

Dei looked at the heels and felt a rush of relief and gratitude towards Itachi. They weren't high enough that she would be uncomfortable, but they were enough to make her look like she had a little too much to drink if she wobbled or tilted a bit from feeling off balance. For the most part she doubted they would really need much of a plan, if someone would be willing to take her just off looks Deidara knew that if she'd been born a girl, she would have been taken and not her sister.

The thought of her sister never failed to send a pang of hurt and longing, but now that Itachi knew, the guilt felt less somehow, as though the burden and knowledge had been hurting her more than the deed itself because she had been made to feel that it was her fault…but Itachi hadn't judged her. He had let her tell the story, he had watched her be emotional and hurt, he had let her relay the story of what had happened to her when she had been male and foolishly in love, when she had been hurt beyond belief. She knew had she still been male Itachi never would have cared, he probably wouldn't care if she died once she went back to being male, and that alone hurt because even as a temporary partner Itachi had been more patient with her than Sasori had.

It seemed like Itachi had two sides and it made her dizzy to even try to contemplate which of the two the real side is. Of course it had nothing to do with the fact that she would miss this, the sense of camaraderie and…affection? She wasn't entirely sure what it was, but she didn't have the heart to question it, because then she might not wish to return to being who she had been born as and part of her had always wondered if maybe she wasn't made to be loved as she had been born anyway. It was easier to separate herself if she was not as attached to who she was trying to be at any rate and it would be easier to go back if she stopped the attachment, attraction, _feeling_ thing they had going now.

She took a deep breath and looked at herself in the mirror. "You can do this Dei. One mission, one chance to find out the truth and take out the bastards that ruined your life before you can finally start to be yourself again. No pressure."

She unlocked the door and walked out, Itachi's dark eyes stared at her, but she walked out the door and went out onto the streets. It wasn't that hard to find a club, to find where the sleaziest of bastards would be together eying women and looking for prey, Dei didn't mind putting herself in the category so long as the mission succeeded. She knew even with herself at risk Itachi would complete the mission if anything went amiss, she trusted her partner that much at least.

She drank a little and continuously nursed at least half a glass of some type of alcohol to make it seemed like she was well on her way to being drunk, her cheeks had a light flush to them from the heat of the bodies dancing and the lights of the place, but overall she was yet to be even tipsy before she was approached, a curl of delight and sadistic pleasure at the thought that these people had no idea what they were getting themselves into as she pretended to stumble into a particular man that had been in the mission details.

"I'm s-sorry, sir," she said, her voice slurring a bit for added effect. The glint in the other man's eyes guaranteed his thoughts were already dirty, looking at her with those filthy eyes and placing his filthy hands on her hips. It was enough to make her stomach curl in disgust, but she withheld it, because she felt another pair of eyes watching her and a familiar chakra signature.

"It's alright miss, I was wondering if maybe you'd like to come with me for the evening?" he asked, rather straightforward one of his hands caressing her ass.

Dei forced out a giggle. "W-why'd someone like _you_ want someone like me? I'm not tha' pretty…"

She said it to make idle conversation, knowing that most young women would not automatically agree to someone who just propositioned them the minute they met. Somehow she was also curious, she knew she had something men desired, but even as Deidara it went largely unrealized and in particular she honestly felt like no one would ever want her because to her she seemed average and she had an undesirable personality.

"Whoever told you that lied to you sweetheart," the man said with a lilt to his voice, tone light as his eyes raked over her body and she felt herself shiver in response. "You're gorgeous and I think you make a lovely companion."

She leaned into his touch and let the man lead her away, but she pretended she was woozy nonetheless and let her eyes rest as she tried not to think about how badly she wanted to just kill the man and couldn't because the mission was to take down the caravan and not just the disgusting men that ran it and lured innocents and women into it only to treat them as glorified sex slaves.

"I think you may have had a bit much too drink, more than most women in fact," he said lightly, making idle conversation.

Dei made a hum in response, seeming to be falling into a deep sleep and letting him do most of the work taking her to the caravan, not that she would have to worry about knowing where she was going, she knew from Itachi's chakra signature he was following and would remember the way back regardless of how far out of the way the caravan is.

The man grinned as he thought of the young woman in his arms, she was exotic and likely to fetch a good price on the market, now all he had to do was get her ready for the show. As he approached the caravan he heard Satou call out, "Hey boss, you sure got a looker tonight!" The others whistled in appreciation.

"You think we can help break her in?" another added, raucous laughter filling the encampment.

He grinned at the thought, but really, someone like this, she was a rare treat and had to be prized, unless she did something that would need to show her what her proper place was. "I'm afraid this one is going to be off limits. I want to sell her as is," he said sharply, but he tossed her over to another man none too gently and said, "She is going to need some help…getting ready for the show."

Dei felt an impending sense of dread but she refused to give way her lucidity, the mission meant more than her body, her male body had been used and abused, she knew she could take whatever pain they were willing to give her female body as well. The mission came first, everything else was secondary…everything else could wait.

The man carrying her was big, over six feet tall and well muscled, and he dropped her on a bed, leaving her alone. She waited until his footsteps faded. Inflitration: Success.


	7. Chapter 7

To Begin Anew

Disclaimer: I do not own it. Never have and never will. Besides, the plotline does not suit my purposes enough to be something I'd think of if it did there would be several things I'd do to fix the things I really don't like, plus I think the plot has pretty much been destroyed. The only thing I currently own are a collection of stories that I've written for books that I haven't finished…

**Warning: Description of violent torture methods and death ahead.**

Chapter 7: The Mission (Part 3)

_Previously_

_Dei felt an impending sense of dread but she refused to give way her lucidity, the mission meant more than her body, her male body had been used and abused, she knew she could take whatever pain they were willing to give her female body as well. The mission came first, everything else was secondary…everything else could wait._

_The man carrying her was big, over six feet tall and well muscled, and he dropped her on a bed, leaving her alone. She waited until his footsteps faded. Inflitration: Success._

Now

She opened her eyes to the empty room. It was small, the light was flickering, but the door was unlocked. Morons. Assuming that just because she was a woman she would be incapable of anything. Then again with how drunk she pretended to be she wouldn't be awake right now if she had been and probably wouldn't have been a threat. Still, Dei felt insulted by the lack of care that went into the whole thing.

The door was not a viable option at all. She did not know how many guards there were stationed in the place and she had no idea with the patrols, so that left…she looked up.

The air vents were perfect, a bit small but it was easier to maneuver the damn things in a woman's body than it had ever been when she was male and infiltrating areas. She occasionally peeked through the vent openings and she could feel her stomach twist as she took in rooms of women, ten to fifteen in some and a few looked no older than 8 years old, all crowded together trying to protect themselves. She looked away as she saw one woman being grabbed by the guard. Clandestine organization she may have joined, but rape was never an option.

She kept quiet, the low hissing of the chill air flowing through the vents. Dei shivered. All she had to do was find the leader. That was her mission. Find and kill the man who had caused her the most heartache, who had torn apart many families including her own.

So what if it was revenge?

It was nothing the bastards didn't deserve and if she took out a few of the other men in order to break the whole business apart?

The world would be a better place for it.

She maneuvered her way around the air vents quickly and efficiently. She glanced in other rooms and found the one she had been looking for. The information room was empty, piles of files on what she (correctly) assumed were information of the slaves they would be selling were there. She quickly opened the vent and jumped down.

She tried desperately to find the only person who she needed to know about. She had to know if Tori had died here, been sold, or if she remained trapped.

It seemed to take ages, but with the clones helping her made quick work of the room and finally, a single piece of paper held all she needed to know. She folded it and slipped it into the bra she wore. She could find out later, for now she had a mission. She left some of the exploding clay behind in the room. Without the documents those women couldn't be slaves.

She crawled around for another twenty minutes before a cruel smirk lit up her face and malice flashed in her eyes as she gazed down into what could only be a meeting…a meeting of the very men she had orders to kill.

"…brought back was perfect. Just what we need to put our trade back into the top position with buyers."

"Thank you," said the man she recognized as the one to bring her in and figured it was her they were talking about.

Her lips curled into a snarl. How dare they talk about her and the other women as if they were trash! How dare they! Her fist clenched, the clay she had hidden being molded in her clenched fists. She couldn't act yet, but if she could she wished she had a knife. The human body was a beautiful thing. So many places you could strike and cut and cause so much pain, yet the human would be alive for hours as they slowly bled out. Even just cutting off bits of flesh might have been satisfactory, take away the men's worth as they did the women's.

Dei planted the bomb and quickly went back to the room she had been in. She checked for guards and patrol along the way and found few. She sighed knowing the odds were they were with the other women. First things first, she had to help them escape.

She opened her room door and waltzed out. A guard not facing her stood in the hallway. Perfect. She snuck up behind him and knocked him out, taking a few of his weapons such as the knife and gun. The gun wasn't a practical weapon, but for last resort it would be fine.

She took the knife and stared at the guard in disgust. She dragged him into the room she had been left in and sliced his neck, a sickening satisfaction filling her. One man who would condemn all those women dead and she couldn't find it in herself to regret it.

She left the room, the blood glistening on the knife as she walked to the first room that held a group of women. She opened the door and let herself in. The women stared at her, whimpers leaving their mouths, but she held a finger to her lips and they remained silent as they turned their heads away from the sight of a man violating their fellow prisoner.

She quickly pulled him off and before he could let out more than a startled breath she sliced through his vocal chords and the arteries in his neck.

"I need all of you to be silent and follow me. We're getting the other females out and then I'm setting off the bombs I rigged this place. Understood?" she stated more than asked.

Nods of agreement were seen as one of the women took initiative and helped clothe the girl who was sobbing on the ground from the act that had just been committed. They would all get out and find peace, but for the moment they had to help each other escape.

She did this with each room and by the time they were all ready to leave the base she heard the first signs of alarm being cried out in the base. They froze and stared at her. She created a clone.

"Stay here and fight any who come this way seeking us," Dei ordered it, before turning to the women. "Follow me quickly. We need to run if we plan to get out of here quick enough for all these bastards to burn."

They started running, following Dei through the different corridors out to the opening, she closed her eyes as she heard the shouts of men behind her following them. When she opened the door that led to their freedom she let the women escape, helping those that tripped and finally the guards had caught up.

Sneers on the men's faces made her cringe but her hands were clenched tightly into fists.

"Where do you think you're going?" One of them asked, grabbing her arm roughly.

She sneered right back. "Away from you bastards."

With that she took the knife and stabbed him before slicing his neck like the other men, she moved quickly through the small number of guards. With the women safe she could complete her mission. She ran for the forest surrounding the compound and once she was fifty feet away, barely in range of the blast radius of all the bombs she had placed as she had gotten the women out, she activated them.

She could feel the heat on her back from the explosion, but she looked up and saw the women she had gotten out and she saw Itachi standing with them a little further away from her. She smiled at him before passing out.

Itachi stared at the woman who had just gone in and infiltrated the ring of slave traders and rapists, the woman who had just killed all of those men and rescued the other women single-handedly…the woman who somehow had the strength to _smile_ at him before passing out.

Itachi walked over to her and saw the burns, but they were not terrible enough to warrant attention of a hospital. He quickly pooled his chakra and began to heal her wounds enough so that he could treat her back in their room and carry her.

"Excuse me?" One of the women said as they walked up to him, keeping her distance at her unease.

Itachi looked over and raised an eyebrow. "Yes?"

"What will happen to her?"

"I will take her back to the hotel we are staying at, heal her as best I can, and then we must return to report the mission to our commander."

The women shifted unconsciously. "You are missing-nin aren't you?"

"Yes," Itachi said blankly.

"Why take a mission such as this?"

"Not all missing-nin remain alone. We are part of a group and our leader chose this mission for us as it is suited to our skills. Missing-nin are not only those who do something wrong, sometimes we do something wrong because it is the right thing."

The women nodded in acceptance. Before they could move to leave Itachi spoke again. "She would want you to be safe. I shall travel with you to the next village over to ensure your safety before I take her with me."

He picked up Dei gently. She had worked her way into his heart somehow. She had gotten to the part of him reserved strictly for family, for _Sasuke_, and he knew she would never forgive him if he didn't protect these women until they reached a safe area.

"Where is the next village?"

Itachi felt his lips twitch into a hint of a smile. "The land of Iron."

He could see the women's relief. The land of Iron was a place of safety, of morals and codes that would help them recover.

Thinking of that he wondered if maybe that would have helped Deidara any after his betrayal, but he shook his head at the thought. Deidara, Dei, the two confused him. He frowned as he recalled the parameters of Dei's contract. She would stay until Deidara was healed and return to wherever she had been before. He felt a small jolt go through him at the thought. He didn't want her to leave. He sighed. He would just have to wait things out and think about his feelings later. Right now he had a mission to finish and their trip would take enough time for him to work out what he felt for Dei.

A/N: This took longer to type than I thought. There should be another five chapters left give or take a few and pending how long I make each of the following chapters.


	8. Chapter 8

To Begin Anew

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto.

Chapter 8: Awareness

_Previously_

_He could see the women's relief. The land of Iron was a place of safety, of morals and codes that would help them recover._

_Thinking of that he wondered if maybe that would have helped Deidara any after his betrayal, but he shook his head at the thought. Deidara, Dei, the two confused him. He frowned as he recalled the parameters of Dei's contract. She would stay until Deidara was healed and return to wherever she had been before. He felt a small jolt go through him at the thought. He didn't want her to leave. He sighed. He would just have to wait things out and think about his feelings later. Right now he had a mission to finish and their trip would take enough time for him to work out what he felt for Dei._

Now

Itachi felt the briefest pangs of worry as they neared the Land of Iron. Deidara would have woken up at some point and cursed him for carrying him. If Dei was anything like her cousin she should have woken by now and talked mindlessly about something instead of cursing him, but she hadn't.

He nearly sighed in relief as they reached the borders, watching as the women began to walk across the line and into a country that would offer them protection. Itachi felt a certain bitterness as he watched some of the young women who were scarcely entering an age where they could barely become Genin walk past him.

"Will she be alright?" one of the women asked, looking at him just before she would cross the border of a land Itachi would not enter.

The other women too looked back as if waiting for the answer. Itachi sighed. "She should be. It is likely not the first nor will it be the last time she has been caught in the aftermath of an explosion such as that. Apparently it runs in her family."

A bemused smile crossed his face for a brief moment at the thought of Deidara and other family members having experienced similar problems of controlling their explosions before is flickered into the blank expression he normally wore. The women scrutinized him, but shrugged it off. "Thank her for us."

Itachi inclined his head before heading back the way he and Dei had travelled to get to the base, bypassing the base and any scouts sent to find out what had happened as he made his way back to the hotel. He cautiously glanced back at Dei who was resting on his shoulder.

Her eyes were closed and she seemed so peaceful in her sleep. It was such a deceptive illusion, something even the best of ninja had mastered in not showing their pain, yet one her it seemed so real and not as fake.

Dei's face was pale, there was a bit of sweat likely from the heat of the explosion and mild fatigue as the past several days had been trying on her both mentally and physically, but she seemed fine. Her hair framed her face giving her a golden hue around her and a sort of serenity. He frowned as he shifted her weight. She felt light…almost too light.

He got into the hotel without a problem, giving a cursory glance at the man who was running the counter for the evening before dragging Dei up to their room. He set her down gently on her stomach so he could get a better look at her back now that he didn't have to worry about the women Dei had gotten out of an illicit facility and numerous people who would be searching for the cause of the disturbance.

He frowned at the numerous burns across her back, but paid more attention to the few cuts that littered her back. He scanned the room and used silencing jutsu to prevent others from hearing any noises Dei might make while being healed, before unsealing a first aid kit from a scroll. He carefully wet a cloth with antibiotics and pressed it against Dei's wounds getting a few winces out of her body as it tensed at the light touches.

Once the wounds were clean Itachi activated a medical jutsu used to scan the body to determine the severity of wounds. The burns weren't as bad as he thought. They might cause minor discomfort at most but with a bit of aloe and moisturizer they would heal fine. The better news was in that the cuts were not infected and he could just heal them with a quick healing jutsu used for minor lacerations.

Dei's back arched as he applied the jutsu, but not away. He was surprised she was arching into his touch and even more surprised when the soft contours of her pale skin touched his hand and seemed to relax at his touch. He could feel the heat of a blush beginning as he sighed and stopped the jutsu once the cuts were fully closed.

He reached his hand out and ran his fingers through Dei's hair, gaining a sigh from the unconscious woman as she, for lack of better word, cuddled into the pillow as a smile crossed her face. Itachi pulled his hand back as he realized what he had just done. How could he have done that? He had never touched an unconscious teammate after healing them, let alone in such an _intimate_ way. The only person he had ever cared for before had been his brother. His teammates and acquaintances he would heal out of obligation but nothing else.

Itachi stared at his hand like it had personally betrayed him, clenching it into a fist until his knuckles had turned white. What was going on with him? Ever since Dei had just waltzed into his life and had replaced Deidara he had begun to feel a growing _connection_, a sort of _attraction_ to her, but he couldn't…

He paled and released his clenched fist as he collapsed boneless on his own bed at the startling realization. He couldn't and yet he _was_. He was beginning to get attached to Dei, beginning to feel attracted, he was falling in _love_ and that was something he had sworn he couldn't do. The only problem now was that he was aware. He could already feel himself pulling away from Dei and trying to severe the growing bonds between them. It would be better this way. She was leaving when Deidara came back anyway.

So why did it hurt so much to think of losing her and never seeing her again?


End file.
